tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1940209088259004106.post388161652708902047..comments2023-04-23T16:33:39.062-04:00Comments on K.T. Crowley: Logline #17K.T. Crowleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08211266985396588133noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1940209088259004106.post-63905865109411843392011-10-18T13:57:47.073-04:002011-10-18T13:57:47.073-04:00I really like this, good job!
Good luck. :)I really like this, good job! <br /><br />Good luck. :)K.T. Crowleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08211266985396588133noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1940209088259004106.post-91907339588841738162011-10-18T12:26:36.894-04:002011-10-18T12:26:36.894-04:00I got a bit confused as to what the mc's natur...I got a bit confused as to what the mc's nature is. Is she a siren? I assume she must have originally had a corporeal body for Lancelot to fall in love with, but maybe not. Can you clarify? Does he fall in love with her reflection or voice or some such? I think you could drop the first phrase and go with: An immortal....<br /><br />"secluded" is unnecessary.<br /><br />Love the stakes.Heather Hawkehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16098673743504191567noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1940209088259004106.post-8853369711683843752011-10-18T10:51:47.759-04:002011-10-18T10:51:47.759-04:00So much better! I think you nailed it.So much better! I think you nailed it.Janice Sperryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00178805752960449557noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1940209088259004106.post-55371330590924186942011-10-17T22:00:17.280-04:002011-10-17T22:00:17.280-04:00Great job revising this from the original. I reall...Great job revising this from the original. I really can't think of much to post, and wish I could be of more use. Good luck!tarakhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11879814735940426961noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1940209088259004106.post-28861654084656072042011-10-17T20:48:43.454-04:002011-10-17T20:48:43.454-04:00Oooo! This is right up my alley. My current WIP in...Oooo! This is right up my alley. My current WIP involves tree spirits too! <br /><br />Anyhoo, back to business...I like this. It makes sense. I want to read more. I'm not sure about the comma before your final "and" but that might just be me. <br /><br />Great job.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com